Shooting Blanks live at The Vinyl Underground
Friday Sept 12th
w/ Accretion Disc, Girls Need Attention and On Sale

I woke up around 3 pm and quickly went downstairs to mow the lawn. I did that and used the weedwacker a bit (always fun) and then came back up and ate some paella and an apple. i drank a ton of water. then i got my gear in order and cleaned my house and hit the road.

i had gone on the vinyl undergrounds website and got some directions and a map. i have no printer so i wrote it all down and redrew the map. stupidly, i threw it in my bin which was in my trunk. so i got about 95% of the way there and started getting lost. matters were further complicated because west chicago was having some kind of festival and the streets were closed and what not. i called matt and he put dan on the phone to coach me through it. i rolled up and matt, brey and dan were already there. matt had said they wanted us to be there at 6 but he wouldnt (nor brey or dan) be able to make it until closer to 7. i had to take the day off so i got there around 6:30, they had all arrived early. oddly, the place was completely dark and no one was around. we started to wonder if the gig was canceled and no one ever told shooting blanks. i didnt really care, i would have just went into the fest. the dude who runs the joint just then showed up. he said things werent going to pop off until closer to 8 so we were all early. he said he was going to get some food and he would be back shortly. matt had told me how since this place was a dry venue the band had scored 40s at a nearby liquor store to get a buzz before the set. of course i was down for that. so we went on a nice little stroll to a weird store that was amongst a bunch of houses in a residential area -- weird. i checked their malts right away, they had red bull and blue bull in quarts, very nice. they also had magnum but not king cobra which was odd. i went for the blue bull, $2 with tax, very nice. i went outside and looked for a place to swill -- behind some dumpsters. as soon as i got back there i saw a massive pile of budweiser 12s and talls, a few magnum 40s, some high life 16s -- looked like a lot of people had been drinking back there. my type of place, i immediately commenced to swillin and trying to kill my blue bull as fast as possible. well we didnt stay back there and started walking back. i recommended that we walk thru an alley so i could swill more. i didnt want to get seen by the cops, they arent too down with the public swillin. we got back and i killed my blue bull and tossed it into a dumpster. dan was hitting his budweiser 40 and brey and matt were drinking water. the dude showed back up again and we loaded in. i guess my public swillin paranoia was worthwhile since the cops came a few times later in the night, lookin for a reason to shut the place down. dan said a cop came up to him as he had his bud 40 brownbagged in hand and said 'thats not a beer, is it?'. dan said no and the cop just walked away.

the 1st band was on sale. their manager introduced himself to me before the show -- his name is mando. im not sure why this band has a manager. not that they arent good, but why do you need a manager, i dont get it. they also had a crazy roadie who was very punk with a leather jacket and shit. one thing he did tho was not very punk, he was smoking a huge pipe like sherlock holmes. that shit smelled pretty good but i know it dont taste that great. well on sale was a 3piece and were pretty tight. the guitarist/singer had a nice imitation ernie ball. their bassist and drummer were really awesome. espcially the drummer.

the 2nd band was Accretion Disc. they explained to me what their name means. metaphysicists theorize about black holes, they say that a black hole cant be seen since its black and space is black, but the light around bends into the black hole, which illuminates the circle ('disc') around it, so you can see the black hole. very odd. i guess this was only their 2nd show. they had their shit together tho. they did play one song though that brey and i decided had the riff from goo goo dolls 'slide' almost exactly. the bassist was real cool and had an older jackson bass which i fell in love with.

the third band was girls need attention. first of all, they had a chick drummer who was definately the best female drummer i have ever seen, and she was even better then many male drummers ive seen. very impressive. the 2nd gutiarist looked like he was about 14. i think he was actually 21 (or not?). now matt is short but he doesnt look 14 or even 18. this guy/kid had small hands and a young face. their band was real good, their singer used a good combination of screaming and singing, the double guitar action was awesome. they only played like maybe 6 songs though. much love to their bassist for using his amp. i had brought mine but it was buryed under equipment and his was right there (and far superiour).

well at some point during these 3 bands me and dan went around the corner to a bar called the cobblestone. i bought a pack of newports, a miller lite draft for me and a shot of J&B, a bud draft for dan = $11.50 (i think). i gave the bartender a $20 and told her to keep it. she said 'youll go to heaven'. its nice to have people be greatful. id tip $9 all the time if i got such a nice reaction. she also was gracious and said goodbye when we left. i raised a toast with the random dude sitting next to me. he later was asking the bartender about a cigerette -- turns out the bar sells single cigerettes for 25 cents, not a bad deal. i used to have a gas station that did that by me. well i will never smoke a whole pack and i just bought em to pass the time before our set. i threw him 2 and he was greatful as well. nice bar. on the way back, some west chicago locals saw me with the camera and told me to take pics of them. i am defiantely feelin the dude with the west chicago shirt, reppin his hood. i told them all to come to the show and they wanted to but i think none had cash. matt and brey were chillin in matts car talking about important band business (and giving each other handjobs).

later we were back chillin outside the venue. some carnie bum lookin dude comes up and starts talkin shit. asking us to get him in the venue for free. i told him its only $5 and we dont get the money anyways, just pay to get in. he bitched and moaned about that like it was $100 and how we werent worth the money. we tried to explain that we dont get the cash. then i just told him straight up that he was broke and had no cash. he was drunk and assured me that he 'owned a TV shop' and had a pocket full of money. i asked to see it and he didnt show me shit. some other dude came up and i guess they knew each other (bum on the left). this other dude seemed ok. the bum dude kept calling me out, saying that i talked alot of shit. he said something about i should be careful and i said straight up that i didnt give a fuck what he would do about it. then somehow these 2 dudes start like freestylin on each other. immediatley i was preparing verses to rap in my mind in case i would need them. i never planned to just start rappin since this wasnt serious or anything and i wasnt involved. the bum dude kept spittin verses that didnt rhyme at all. when the other dude would drop a wack line on the bum i was saying shit like 'damn, he burned you real bad dude'. then the bum starts getting crazy on me saying that i shouldnt talk shit and that he would smoke me next or some shit. he kept talking about a 'war of words'. so i handed matt my camera and dropped a verse from 'brandin asses' on him. his immediate response was that i didnt write it and that i was rappin other peoples shit. then i got mad. i turned my hat around and stepped like 2 inches from his face. then i dropped a verse from 'zamboni' and i was poking him the chest and spittin in his face. at the end of the verse i just added something like 'and get the fuck out of here you stupid ass carnie'. everyone laughed their ass off and the dude left like 5 minutes later. people were coming up to me and shaking my hand and shit, asking if those were my rhymes (including the doorman, a real cool guy). i feel kind of bad and kind of stupid because out-rappin a bum/carnie is like beating up a retarded kid or something. pretty weak shit. but oh well, he brought it on himself. he said straight up that he wanted to have a 'war of words'.

well we finally went on last. we opened with 'shelia' and i was calling off the 1-2-3-4 for every song like the misfits. i accidentally did it for 'silly goose' and forgot that song starts with a snare fill. we closed with 'simple song' and it was truly awesome, then brey tackled me down in the final seconds of the song and we all fell in a heap. at one point during the set i slipped real bad on some sweat or water or something and fell on my ass. matt also knocked my pick out of my hand in the 1st song and i played with my hand for a few seconds until i could locate my pick on the floor. we only had 1 mic so brey would run up and yell a backup here and there. i would just nudge matt during the song and he would let me have the mic and i would sing verses and shit. i sang the whole beginning of 'another chance' which was awesome.

we loaded out and i got a little lost, ended up taking roosevelt road all the way home which was ok. then i had to lug all my fucking gear once again. i ate some more of the paella with some rattitoulle mixed in and some breaded chicken. now its 231 am and i just got out of the shower. i took some allieve when i got home and it did the trick. now i have to go to the store to buy some light bulbs and baking soda for my rank ass smellin garbage. it was a great show again and its been the biggest opportunity to challenge myself as a musician playing with shooting blanks. i couldnt think of a better bunch of people and musicians to be in a band with and it was truly fucking great. im pretty sad that its over now. it will be fun to see shooting blanks play again when deech is well enough and i will really have a new appreciation for the songs. thanx a ton guys, i had a fucking blast. shooting blanks fucking rules.

--satan165

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